Wrapped in Friendship

What could have been a really sad day, filled with tears, God turned into a blessing.

September 18

Today is the anniversary of my mom’s passing. Seven years ago I flew up to Canada with my husband praying I would get there before she died. I just wanted to see her one last time. When I got on the plane, the doctors said she only had two hours to live. God intervened and I was able to spend an entire day with her and the nurses let me spend the night as well. I didn’t sleep that night because she was really struggling to breathe. She had Pulmonary Fibrosis, which is a disease that causes your lungs to form scar tissue and thicken. Eventually, your lungs can no longer do their job. By early morning she just couldn’t do it anymore. With tears running down my face I asked her to wait, try to hold on just a little longer. My dad was on his way, along with her favorite brother and the rest of the family. She did hang on just long enough for my dad to walk up to the bed, give her a kiss, and tell her he loved her. She tried to open her eyes one last time and passed away.

I was blessed to have a really sweet relationship with my mom. I still think of her every day. I still wish I could share with her the events of my life. I know I will see her again one day, but today on the anniversary of her death I am a little sad and I miss her. I went to bed last night thinking about her and the last night we spent together. I woke up this morning thinking about her and wishing she was here. Tomorrow is my birthday. Honestly, I have always been grateful that God allowed my mom to pass the day before my birthday. I will never forget the anniversary of her death. I will never feel guilty that the day passed and I didn’t remember. I morn her loss and the next day I celebrate that this amazing woman gave me life. Most of the time when I think of my mom I smile, I have such precious memories of her. I’m really not sure why my heart is so heavy this year.

What could have been a really sad day, filled with tears, God turned into a blessing. I was able to do my bible study homework and prayer time outside on my patio. The weather couldn’t have been more beautiful. The sun was shining, the air was cool, the breeze rustled the leaves in the trees and the birds were singing. Just a little piece of paradise. One of my friends arranged for a birthday lunch at her house. She invited several other friends and we spent a lovely afternoon together. No one knew what today meant to me. No one knew about the anniversary of my mom’s passing. They just wanted to bless me and they did. But God knew. He wanted me to have a full and joyful day. He knew I was sad but didn’t want to give me the opportunity to sink into it. He crowded out the enemy with love. He wrapped me in friendship and fellowship. He guarded my heart against unnecessary sadness I still wish my mom was here, but I’m smiling. I feel loved and blessed. As I head off to bed my heart is full.