A Higher Calling Than Happiness

There is inside of me a desire to make life so good here, it feels like heaven.

September 17

Suffering always breaks my heart. Whether it is the suffering of someone I know, someone I have heard of, or a story from the bible, suffering seems wrong. As I have been reading through the bible this year I have been particularly moved by the sadness of some of the stories. In years past I think I tended to look at what God did and the victories. I love a happy ending. I need a happy ending. I remember the first time I went to the movies and watched a story that did not have a happy ending; I didn’t just feel sad, I felt cheated. This year these stories in my bible are leaving me a little sad. I know the end of THIS story is good. God wins. But there are so many tragedies, miss-steps, and downright abominations. Things like sacrificing their children to false gods, murder, adultery, destructive jealousy, just to name a few. The Bible is not for the faint of heart. Normally I am just so grateful for God’s mercy, I pass through the difficult parts of the stories and am grateful for God’s patience and redemption. God has been reminding me for years that we are not in the garden. This is not my home. Some things will never be right. There is inside of me a desire to make life so good here, it feels like heaven. I want to avoid pain and suffering. I feel God thwarting me. Don’t get me wrong, life is really good right now. But He is stirring within me a longing, a desire for more. God knows if He allows me to make heaven here, it will become my hell. I will miss the best of life. My true desire is for the things of God. To follow after Him all the days of my life and into eternity. I want to join Him in His story. I don’t want to be a spectator. But this world He gave us can be distracting. There is so much beauty and so much pain. I am grateful God will not let me settle for good. He is calling me to great. When I am tempted to get comfortable and settle for the beauty this world offers, He reminds me this is not my home. He reminds me never to forget that I am a daughter of the King. I have a higher calling than simple happiness in comfortable surroundings. I am to have joy, deep abiding joy, which comes from knowing Him who created me and partnering with Him. I am privileged to be a part of the miracles He does in the lives of others. I am thankful to God my King, that he never leaves me or forsakes me. I am my beloved and my beloved is mine.